So this new format.... kinda weird....

I'm not sure I like it. This giant white box is kind of intimidating. Plus it will also trick me into thinking I haven't written that much, so I'll write more, which is NOT a trick I need to be tricked with. But whatever. There is no turning back.

So my August flew like Augusts usually do. At least I made it through this last one with a lot less grief. Quite literally. My internship was truly pretty amazing. I gained a huge respect for my church. Yeah, it's got it's hangups, but all people groups and institutions and organizations do. It takes a lot of work to make a church and it's parts run. And there are so many interesting and broken but beautiful people and groups at my church. I just love those Eve's Angels, and I was very surprised by the refugees too. When I found out that Bruce really wanted me to work with them a lot, I wasn't that thrilled, I think mostly because I was afraid. It's intimidating to work with people who you don't understand and whose culture is the complete opposite from yours. I didn't want to offend them, and I didn't think of them as a people group on my heart. But after working with them and being in their homes and seeing their lives, I really kinda fell for them. They're beautiful people, and most people are if you actually try to get to know them. I cannot imagine being 40, spending 17 years of my life in a bamboo hut in a refugee camp, and then being thrown in the middle of America, where I don't know the language or the system, where people don't want to be patient enough to understand me, and being expected to know how to live. But lots of them have maintained relatively positive outlooks. And like I said, they are real, loving people. I had my first encounter with Hinduism, including a Hindu priest who travels around the world to bless people. Accidentally interrupted one of his services. And also had my first real encounter with idols. I don't think I've ever really seen an idol. Like physical idol. And I saw an entire shrine of them. Very interesting. But anyways....

I was also able to reorganize a disaster of a household items closet for the refugees. I was able to come up with a new system that should hopefully make the incoming and outgoing of food pantry items easier. And redid the sheet that they give to all the people that come in to the church office, looking for help. It hadn't been redone since like, 2000, so I was really proud of that. Through this internship, I felt a sense of ownership, which was cool. And I have realized that we often operate from a viewpoint of "well what can this church do for me?" rather than "what can I do to help this church?" So overall, it was a positive experience, and I am kind of wishing there was such a thing as a church social worker. You would get to work with SO many different kinds of people, especially inner city churches. Idk. It was just really neat.

And now, we're getting ready to head back to SAU. For one last time. It's so weird. And it hasn't sunk in yet. It probably won't until this time next year. But this is the last time I will move in to Spring Arbor. This is my last year, my last hurrah. My last chance. I've slowly been barreling my way through all my crap in the garage. I think I'm pretty much done with my garage stuff, which is good. And I've gotten a bunch of new stuff. I am PUMPED for this year, to be honest. I really think my apartment is going to be great. I have some great roommates that I anticipate will hopefully be fairly drama free. And I finally have more space and more independence. No meal plan this year, ladies and gentleman. I have to start cooking for myself. Which I am excited/terrified about. And intramurals this year is gonna be friggen awesome. I'll miss Lauren and Scooter for sure, but I'm back with Kip and Ange and will be with Jess Clarke for the first semester and MAN it's gonna be sweet :) :) :) And I have lighter semesters, including a rock climbing class that I'm taking with Tammera. Gonna be awesome. And idk, there's just lots of good things. I'm cooking up some SAU bucket list items to ensure some adventure. In case I haven't made it clear, I am very excited.

I also want to continue my quest to be a better person. Some people may not see it, or just may choose not to see it, or just haven't been paying attention, but I'm getting better with some stuff. Some fears, to be more exact. Maybe not getting over, but facing. I got my ears pierced, which is something I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to do. But I love them. Dangly earrings are so much fun! And I went off the zipline, which literally, my first words when I got to the top of the tower to learn how to set up the climbing tower were "I will never jump off this thing." And I jumped off the blob. I have tried to for three years now, and I did it this year, and really, when I got to the top of the tower, it didn't take that long. I actually like thunderstorms in some contexts now. Still working on balloons and fireworks, but I'm not a superhero. I feel somewhat proud of some of the things that I've pushed myself to do. I'm even getting a little better with confrontation. It literally still kinda makes me sick, but I can do it. I'm learning to trust that my real friends aren't going to leave me, despite the fact that some have. But anyways, as Kim, my boss says, "I'm getting betta!"

My next feat.... learning to trust guys. I want to make more guy friends this year. And being more pleasant. I've decided that I am pretty distrustful of guys, and that I hold guys accountable to a more than I hold girls. So.... I'll be working on that.... which will mean facing some demons. That won't be fun.

Well... some goals that I have for this year/my life (I found these in a notebook from when I took Core 300 for Jterm, and feel re-inspired.)

1. Be the best whatever I am that I can be
2. Live a life that preaches Christ
3. Live like I am victorious and loved because I am.
4. Be in tune and intimate with God.
5. See God everywhere in everything in all I do.

 K well I need to go. Cuz this looks a lot in the new format, meaning that it's like, a ton. SOooooo here's to a new and final year :) Expecting great things.